Loving You More and More - Part 1

Hello, beautiful queens. Welcome to a part 1 of a 2-part article on loving my favorite person....YOU! Yes, there is a lot of info out there and much has been said about self-love and its importance in healing and growth. There are many ways to enhance self-love. There are 5 simple tips that you can use to be kind to yourself and increase you level of self-appreciation. This post will cover the first three.

TIP ONE

Write Down The Good Stuff

Appreciate what you have!

Sometimes we don't realize just how much we already have and the things we've already accomplished. You have already accomplished so much in your life that you fail to take note of. Schools, weddings, buying a house, maybe even giving birth. You may have also gone through trauma, illness, loss and/or other times of unhappiness or sadness. Yet you do not give yourself credit or enough credit for any of it, and there is no reason NOT to be proud of these experiences. Even the unpleasant one because you ARE STILL standing!

This is just the tip of the iceberg, and there is no way to write about all you have accomplished in writing. But you should try especially when you're feeling that you've not done enough. Because it is only when you start to write down all that has happened to you and all that you appreciate that you come to understand how lucky you are. Gratitude and appreciation are just a mindset. Unless you develop these skills, you are still going to search for more and more and more. But despite getting more and more, you are never going to be satisfied.

Always remember that God is good all the time! We have to recognize even the smallest of blessings. You can count this as a blessing...you're reading this post! So you are alive with cognition and sight! Thank God for that.

The world is full of people seeking more and more, and it never works. What does work is being appreciative and grateful for what you have? Keep a gratitude journal close to your bedside.

Every morning and evening, write down just 3 things that you are happy about. It does not matter what is coming up or how the day went, you just have to write down 3 things in the gratitude journal. This will create a positive shift throughout the day.

As you write down and look over all of the positive things that happened in your life, you will start to cultivate a mindset of appreciation. And as this happens, you start to appreciate life more, which will have a snowball effect. Make a habit of writing down all that you enjoy. It is one of the easiest and most effective strategies to cultivate self- love. You have far more to be joyful for than you believe, but you need to take the first step and remove yourself from a negative mindset.

 If writing does not suit you, you could also just remember some happy memories or keep a scrapbook full of nice pictures or pictures on your phone. Look at them often to remind yourself of positive. And more importantly appreciate yourself!

TIP TWO

 

Eliminate the Trash

Yes, you deserve better than what you are achieving right now. And you should not be in any way reluctant to get rid of things that are not serving you. Things that you need to eliminate will likely include the news, social media, technology, bad foods, alcohol, cigarettes, negative thoughts, and procastination in general.

But it goes further than this. You have to get out of a relationship that you are not fully committed to or is holding you back. While the idea of finding fulfillment from a partner alone is incredibly misguided, you should at least feel happy with your partner and be compatible. If not, be kind to yourself and find a different significant other. The same applies to friends. Rid yourself of naysayers. I recently ended a 40+ year friendship for that very reason.

Work is one place where you need to really make sure you are the right fit. If you are really unhappy in the role, then leaving might be the better option. Don't just quit, but take your time to find the right opportunity. A toxic work environment can be very damaging to your self-esteem, stressful and difficult. Trust me, I've been there! With one particular job I had, I would wake up and burst into tears everytime I realized that I had to go to that place. It was that bad. If you really want the life of your dreams, you can have it but you have to go for it.

The best way to care of yourself involves eliminating many of the things that make you feel bad. Ensure that you are putting yourself first by removing negatives....people and thoughts.

This is a far more simple step than most people make it out to be. When you have finally quit your toxic job or relationship, you will feel relieved. There are few, if any, who have said that quitting their job to do something they love was a bad decision.

You will also have to eliminate limiting beliefs. These beliefs often stop you from really caring about yourself. You might believe that you are not a confident person or that you are always depressed or introverted. But these beliefs often come from a single past experience that you thought about a lot and repeated to yourself. Identifying then changing past behaviors is key to having a more productive and happier future.

When you adopt positive beliefs your enjoyment will truly start to unfold and you can unashamedly pamper yourself without any guilt or reluctance.

TIP THREE

Take a Break: Be Happy Now

Everyone needs rest and relaxation. What this looks like is unique to everyone. It could be sitting comfortably and reading a book, having a spa day, taking a walk in nature or binge watching a good show on Netflix. For me, it is creating. Whether its a post like the one you're reading, a new recipe or making whipped body butter.

Identify what you like to do, what relaxes you or makes you happiest and fit those things into your daily life as much as possible. Because you deserve to do them frequently for the queen you are.

When you put off things you NEED, it can create a sense of restlessness in the mind and eventually make you resentful.

Most people put off living their life until they can go on vacation or to that special event. However, joy and happiness need to be present in work, play, home and vacation time. They are not something to be put off for one single second. One way to increase your vibe is music. Play your favs while you drive, cook, clean, whatever.

You should smile going into work and smile coming out. While this might round ridiculous, there is no reason it cannot be this way except for your conditioning.

Despite the seriousness of any event, you can reframe it in your mind for the better. And you can change most circumstances in such a way that you have a better understanding of why its occurring. Consider that many people are happy just to have food or their health. Make a habit of being happy at all times instead of waiting for something special to happen. Remember that life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it. There is always something to appreciate. If worse comes to worst, you can just open your gratitude journal to see how good life really is

Always schedule regular relaxation time for whatever it is that you like to do on a daily basis, then you can be happy for that during the day. As a single mother of two, my "me time" was twice a day, in the morning before the kids got up and at night after they went to bed. Even if it were only 15-20 minutes, I made time for me alone. .

By analyzing your day, you get a sense of stressors, time wasters, habits and can plan ahead on how to prevent the same issues from interrupting your glow and flow tomorrow.

So, queens, rule your queendom well and join me for part 2 and the conclusion of Loving You More and More!

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